Mary Boleyn – portrait – © Unknown artist – The Royal Collection Trust
Anne Boleyn – portrait – © Unknown Artist – The National Portrait Gallery
“…she was called the English Mare, because of her shameless behaviour; and then the royal mule, when she became acquainted with the King of France.”
- Nicholas Sander in his 1585 book ‘Rise and Growth of the English Schism’
As you can already gather from the title of this week’s post, we shall be discussing one of the most famous of Henry VIII’s (and in fact, one of the most famous royal mistresses in the whole of history) mistresses (along with a small glimpse at her sister who would be known to history as the mistress who made herself a Queen); Lady Mary Boleyn and her sister, Lady Anne Boleyn.
This week’s post is certainly one of my favourites to write as the Boleyn sisters have a special place in my heart (and one of the main reasons behind the creation of The Ill-Fated Wives of Henry VIII, might I add) and so forgive me if I find myself going on any tangents or speaking too passionately about Mary Boleyn or her sister as I simply cannot help myself, ha ha!
And so, without further ado, let us take a look into who Mary Boleyn was and how she is known as one of the most ‘shameful’ and promiscuous women of the Tudor era and most befitting of the title ‘royal mistress’.
. . .
As was common during the Tudor era, the exact year of birth for Mary Boleyn is unknown (similar to her younger siblings) which makes it difficult to pinpoint how much younger she would have been than her royal lover(s) but it is believed that she was born between the years of 1499 and 1504 at Blickling Hall in Norfolk—as her younger brother George is believed to have been born circa.1504-1508 and her sister Anne circa.1501-1505.
Despite common misconception, it is believed that Mary was the eldest of the three surviving children of a possible eight (as all her other siblings sadly did not live past early infancy as was also common during Tudor times as child mortality was at a high) to her parents Thomas Boleyn, 1st Earl of Wiltshire (a man known for using his high-skills in political affairs for achieving his own goals for himself and his family) and his wife, Elizabeth Boleyn (nee Howard), Countess of Wiltshire (a woman was seen as quite pleasing to both look at and engage with for men of the English court).
Evidence to suggest that Mary was the eldest of the siblings or at least older than Anne is that she married before Anne, as traditionally throughout history, the elder sister would have to be married before the younger could (yes, I am referencing one history’s best romances; Jane Austen’s ‘Pride and Prejudice’ where this tradition is challenged through Kitty Bennett marrying before her eldest sisters and oldest sister, Jane—God, I need to stop making so many tangents!)
Since Mary was the ‘eldest’ of her two siblings, her parents doted on her as equally as they did their sole surviving son and youngest daughter, ensuring that Mary learnt the necessary and expected skills for a woman wanting to secure a suitable marital match as well as maintain a highly sought-after place within the English court.
The Boleyns moved from their estate at Blickling Hall to their permanent residence at Hever Castle in Kent at some point during Mary’s early childhood and it was here that she was raised and here that she learnt many fine skills alongside her younger siblings such as; a conventional education deemed suitable and essential for young ladies of higher social ranking which included grammar, history, arithmetic, reading, spelling and writing.
Naturally, women also received training in other ‘feminine’ accomplishments which would help a woman stand out as ‘suitable’ wife material or helpful for succeeding in the royal court. From dancing, embroidery, etiquette, household management (as women were reasonable for running the household in her husband’s absence), music, needlework and singing. Her sister Anne also learnt these skills and it is strongly believed that both sisters shared a love of commonly played games and activities such as cards, chess, archery, falconry, riding and hunting—although the last few were not common skills for women to hold but her father might have seen this as an advance that his two daughters could have over other women their age for making a name for themselves.
Sadly, it would be Thomas Boleyn’s three children that would bring ruin to a once illustrious bloodline and possibly have disgraced them in history books forevermore.
. . .
Rest assured, Mary’s fine education and extremely long CV-almost of skills learnt on the assumed persistence of her father permitted her a good start in her early life as, with help from her father’s high position and influence at court, in 1514 (at the believed age of fourteen, possibly fifteen), Mary was honoured by the chance to accompany the king’s sister, Princess Mary Tudor, as a maid-of-honour to Paris as she was arranged to marry the very-much-older-than-her King Louis XII of France.
Quite a bit older?!
Princess Mary was only eighteen at this time whilst her betrothed was fifty-two years old, making him thirty-four years her senior!
Henry surely picked a much older consort for his sister than the one chosen for him as Catherine was only six years older than him, not much of a difference, right?
But imagine having a husband who was literally old enough to be your father and who already had children closer to age to his future wife!
Not to mention, at this point, he had already sired an illegitimate son who had died just three years before Princess Mary was leaving her beloved homeland of England for France to marry the French King.
Seems like even in his advanced age, he was still having a bit of fun, eh?
How his two daughters would have reacted to knowing that their new stepmother was almost the same age as them (she could have been their sister if you think about the similarity in age) and how their father was only marrying her to possibly father a legitimate male heir that could inherit the French throne—we will never know.
They probably thought he was too old, bless them.
Anyway!
It appears that Mary was seen as quite likeable by the Tudor Princess as a few short weeks upon arriving in France and officially becoming Queen of France, the now-Queen Mary’s maids were all sent away, save Mary herself which was most likely down to the fact that her father was now the new English Ambassador to France who had moved there temporarily and had brought over her younger sister Anne to study in France to further her education in the way that he had done with Mary.
This could further be supported by the fact that, even after the death of King Louis XII in 1515 left Princess Mary widowed and no longer Queen of France (as her husband’s daughter Claude had married his successor Francis I, making him the new King of France), Mary was still granted a place within the French court as a member of the new King and Queen of France’s household.
Not a bad way to make the most out of your royal mistress’ awful change in circumstances, eh?
Especially since Princess Mary would go on to anger her beloved brother King Henry VIII by secretly marrying his closest childhood friend, Charles Brandon on their way back to England, without his knowledge or his approval, causing a stir upon her return to England.
. . .
Francis I’s royal court was known for being one filled with lively parties, promiscuity (to a certain extent) and always buzzing with gossip, scandalous rumours and excitement that worried court nobles to their core as they wished to protect their beloved daughters and female family members from being ‘corrupted’ by the ways of the King’s court.
Sadly, if the words of Rodolfo Pio and two others are to believed, Thomas Boleyn’s worries would soon become a reality as there was little he could do to prevent the ‘corruption’ of his beloved daughter Mary, as her respectable reputation would soon become tarnished by her inexcusable, ‘whorish’ behavior.
Care to take a guess what she was beginning to do?
Yes, you guessed it, Mary became well known at the French court, and undoubtably at the English court since Thomas Boleyn was one of the King’s most respected politicians, as it was during this time that she supposedly embarked on her many sexual affairs with the men of the French court. But it would be her alleged royal affair at the French court that would mark her out as being a very ‘shameful’ woman indeed.
Who was the royal that Mary allegedly had this very scandalous affair with?—Only the King of France himself, Francis I.
Known for his own sexual promiscuity (or being ‘clothed in women’ as goes the famous phrase) as he regularly cheated on his wife, Queen Claude, with many of the beautiful and elegant women of his court, it would be no surprise that he allegedly would pick Mary as his next conquest. It is said that his friends at court ‘sampled’ her before he took her to his own bed, as Mary’s promiscuity is said to have been quite extreme (although I personally believe that this has all been exaggerated over the years to further tarnish the Boleyn name in the same way her sister Anne’s own reputation has continually been tarnished since her death).
Trouble was, Mary’s alleged affair with the King left her with quite a tarnished reputation and with low chances of obtaining a suitable marital match as no man would willingly choose a King’s leftovers as their bride, especially knowing that she was not pure as a Tudor woman ought to be.
What made things worst was that Francis I held nothing back in terms of keeping the affair ‘under wraps’ as he is most famously known for saying (as a letter by Rodolfo Pio reads) that the King often referred to her as his ‘English mare’ (a female horse, a crude reference to her being ‘ridden’, no explanation should be necessary to understand the link, I do hope), or his ‘favourite hackney’ (another horse reference, seems like he loved those) and a quote that will forever be linked to Mary Boleyn; “una grandissima ribalda, infame sopra tutte” (which translates to ‘a very great whore, the most infamous of all’)—seems like he had quite a lot to say about her!
. . .
Following her return to England in around 1519/1520, Thomas Boleyn arranged for Mary to enter the highly respected and sought-after household of the English Queen Catherine of Aragon as a maid-of-honour as a way of teaching her the proper etiquette for a sophisticated lady. After all, Mary was considered very much a beautiful woman in her time so naturally, she had a place in the Queen’s service.
Mary was quickly married off to her first husband, Sir William Carey, who was a wealthy gentleman of the King’s court and one of his favourites which was probably why he served the king as a Gentleman of the Privy chamber as well as an Esquire of the Body to the King. Both of these roles were very serious and were only given to the King’s favourites or someone who had great power and influence in the English court.
All manners of people were present at the wedding, including both parties’ family members, members of the court and even the King and Queen, a rare sight indeed. But then, Mary was one of her ladies at the time.
Thomas must have felt slightly relieved to know that he could possibly improve his daughter's chances of a long-lasting future at court by marrying her off to a high-standing gentleman and placing her in the Queen’s service.
Regardless of this, it did not take long for Mary to stir up trouble in the English court.
For she had now caught the gaze of the King of England, Henry VIII, her mistress’ own husband.
. . .
King Henry, alike Francis I, was known as a player and a womanizer by this point in time; there was always a rumour flowing about the court that the King had taken another mistress or gossip spreading amongst the women about who they think might catch the King’s eye next.
Whether all the women of the court wished to be the King’s mistress is uncertain, but most of his mistresses might have either been attracted to the King or persuaded otherwise to slip into his bed (either by the King’s seductive nature or by a family member, hoping that they might benefit from her keeping the King entertained, so to speak).
But for Mary, the best guess of her affair with the King starting is in around 1522, at the earliest.
According to historian Susan Abernethy, it was during March of this year, Mary (alike her sister Anne) participated during a masquerade (there are claims for and against this so I cannot say if this is 100% accurate) pageant as part of the celebrations for the arrival of the Spanish ambassador in which Mary might have initially caught the attractive gaze of the King with her sophisticated dancing and exquisite beauty.
Either way, it did not take long for the very public affair between Mistress Boleyn and the King to blossom, although Susan Abernethy believes that Mary might have initially attempted to reject the King’s advances to preserve what little respect she had left and to honour her marriage vows. Regardless, there is no doubt that an affair took place, even if the exact details are unknown or if the evidence to confirm it is scarce.
Mary’s affair with the King most definitely made an impact on her family. We do not know how long the affair lasted as it might have lasted years or it might have even been a one night stand, we simply do not know because of the lack of evidence.
Her father and husband benefitted the most, this much is sure.
However, there is one person who seemed a little—left out, shall we say?
And this is when the tables turned on Mary, as her sister was not about to let her sister reap all the benefits from being attractive to the King.
But there is still one issue that remains; did Mary provide her royal lover with illegitimate children, just like Bessie Blount had before her?
During her first marriage to Sir William Carey, Mary conceived two children; Catherine who was born in 1524 and Henry who is believed to have been born circa. March 1525 but no later than 1526.
What is the issue with that, you might ask?
Well, during her affair with the King, it is believed that Carey was fairly compliant considering he was reaping the benefits of the affair and there appeared to be no romantic feelings towards the marriage on his side, but it is believed that these two children are not his but in fact the King’s bastard children.
Debates over the validity of the claims have long since persisted with many believing the claim might be valid because of the fact Carey had to shut down rumours of his wife’s siring of offspring with the King shortly before succumbing to the sweating sickness many years later.
Whether or not her two firstborn children were the King’s or not, it made no difference to Carey but—if Mary’s children were Henry’s, his wish to have one of his children maintain the throne of England would have been fulfilled to some degree as Mary’s children are the direct ancestors to later monarchs such as Queen Victoria, possibly Princess Diana and eve our beloved current monarch, Queen Elizabeth II.
Meaning that Henry might have gotten his wish if he had chosen his first Boleyn mistress to take as his second wife and not her sister Anne who we will learn about much later.
. . .
Obviously, historians know for a fact that Henry ended the affair with Mary Boleyn in 1525, most certainly because, at this point, she would have been laying in her resting chamber, preparing to give birth to (assumedly) the King’s illegitimate son, the King might have grown bored with her and was unable to continue the affair physically as a result of her condition.
And with this, his attentions turned to her younger sister Anne.
I think we all know what happens next.
And if you don’t, sit back and wait for us to talk about his relationship with Anne at a later point, as she went from a mistress unwillingly to sleep with the King to a disgraced Queen who sadly met a tragic end.
Back to Mary!
After the affair ended and she gave birth to her second child and firstborn son, Mary’s first husband died after suffering from the sweating sickness which left her penniless and forced to enter the English court once more, this time as a member of her sister’s household, who was now Queen. Only she did not stay there too long as she would secretly marry a soldier of little standing and far low her social ranking, William Stafford, without first consulting or asking her father nor her Queen’s permission, Anne took no care for her sister’s circumstances and subsequently banished her from court, along with her husband.
This would be the last time the sisters would see one another, as Mary would not return to court nor be able to see her sister or brother in their last moments.
Although some historians believe that Anne’s disownment of her sister might have been out of jealousy or fear; there were concerns that the King might once again start or might have already revisited his affair with Mary and might cast Anne aside in favour of her sister who had proven she could have a son through her first marriage.
Though I doubt this very much, it is still something that could be considered truthful since Anne was a very jealous woman when it came to her husband’s seductive nature.
Once a cheater, always a cheater, the saying goes.
. . .
The rest of Mary’s life is quite depressing as the start of it, sad to say.
When her family were in ruins and her siblings were imprisoned within the Tower, Mary tried desperately to see them but was turned away. There is even a belief that Mary requested a private audience with the King as a final resort to saving them from their inevitable doom. Even if she appealed to the King’s heart, his mind was set on ridding himself of the wife that disappointed him, even if it meant killing her to achieve his new goal of marrying his third wife and her cousin, Jane Seymour.
After her family’s ruin, Mary faded away into relative obscurity and retired to the countryside with her husband, enjoying a happy and blissful marriage which resulted in several more offspring. It seemed as though she had cleared herself of any involvement with her disgraceful family or any recurrences with her past. And this seemed to work in her favour as her eldest daughter would go on to serve her ex-lover’s fifth wife (and another cousin of Mary’s), Catherine Howard.
Whatever became of Mary is unknown as she would die of unknown causes on the 19th of July 1543, in her early forties and outlasting all her siblings as well as her parents.
It is believed that she resigned herself with the tragedy that had befallen her and tried to keep herself away from the mischievous ways of the court, though she was said to have spoken well of her sister and the King in her last days, showing them both the respect and love she had always borne them.
Such a sad life to lead when you are given all the tools necessary for building a quaint and untroubled life.
Seems like being a Boleyn was more of a curse to Mary and her siblings than it was a blessing.
Let us hope she found peace with her husband in her final days, hmm?
Until next time…
- Have a ‘Tudor-fic’ week!